Date Night

So my husband decided to plan a surprise date night for me. In preparation he made reservations, booked the babysitter & decided he should maybe just let Skylar know the plan so that she is prepared tomorrow for the surprise also.

Turns out that telling her today was not a good idea. So I am bathing Sadie & Skylar & Daddy are hanging out in the living room. D'Arcy whispers to Skylar that he has a surprise planned for me tomorrow night & that he is taking me on a date. He said her face dropped immediately & tears began to well up in her eyes - But Shelby your favourite babysitter is coming . . . . Skylar comes running into the bathroom crying & when I ask her what happened she responds "I can't tell you what Daddy said".

Children are interesting that way. She plans each night & has friends come & go continually through the week. She plays from basically after supper to bed time as she should. But if I go for coffee with a friend (which believe me is like never) I get tears & "but you just went out" (18 days ago!). Half the time she is trying to get us out of her way so that her & her friends can use the living room but if we plan a date we get "Don't you want to spend time with me Mommy?".

I am continually reminded by D'Arcy that kids have a limited vision of life. They think primarily of themselves and are learning to broaden their understanding of others & learn empathy.

Goodness complicated little creatures they are? Do they spend this much time deciphering us? I think not. I often wonder who indeed is in control - are we really or are they just leading us to believe we are?

There was a time that I did some important tasks in my day. I created a work solution for mailing bills to clients that saved my employer thousands of dollars on a monthly basis. I would do across Canada presentations to a room full of Service Reps. I hired/fired/promoted and the list goes on & on.

Today I have purchased some clothing for my girls (75% off - very exciting!). I picked up toys for pretty much all of my day & moved Sadie out of the bathroom probably about 10x (she loves the toilet). I have made a delicious & healthy supper of chicken wraps & rice - with fruit & cool whip for dessert. And I just made 4 "Tinker Bell Posters" for Skylar's Tinker Bell club.

Yep - there are times when I have a few moments of quiet and I think - Is this for real? Am I really doing this all day? Shouldn't I get a bonus for this? Can I have a closed door meeting please? When do I get to go for lunch? Maybe I should shower/get dressed.

The life of a Mommy is a tough job. Not alot of praise but thankfully lots of love. Hang in there girls! We will make it through.

Suppertime!

I think my absolute favourite time of the day is suppertime. We all are together & it is just us - no interuptions - no distractions. We get a chance to see how everyone's day went & We also get to eat!

I am fortunate in that I have a husband that always praises my meals & thankfully our daughter Skylar is very gracious in ensuring I know how yummy dinner was. As a mom/wife I find this extremely satisfying. Pleasing my family (yep I think I am turning into a Baba) gives me much satisfaction.

We giggle & hear about the good things in our days - I tell all the silly things Sadie has done that Skylar & D'Arcy missed & we get a chance to just sit together. Sadie loves dinnertime. She loves to point at what we are eating & try new things. We love to see her experiment!

Tonight as a treat we had a little dessert. Apple & Banana pieces that we dipped in chocolate. As you can see the girls LOVED this!

As a Mom I am going to really try to keep this time together "ours".

First Day of School!

Yikes!

I honestly thought my friends were crazy insane when they stressed out & cried when their little ones went to school. I always thought - shouldn't their kids be stressed out not them?

Fast forward to my new "Mom" life & I honestly don't think I will sleep tonight. All I can think of is Skylar going to her new school. I am thinking about whether she will remember the way to her class, whether the lunch I packed is "appropriate", whether I remembered all the forms, whether she has all she needs supplies wise, whether the kids will be nice to her, whether she will find someone to be her lunch buddy, whether she will see the board with her new glasses, OMG - I am a mess!

Thankfully she is sleeping peacefully & though a little nervous she is calmed by my continuous affirmation that she is the absolute cutest & friendliest kid & her only problem will be too many friends. This brings a huge smile to her face & seems to calm her. Now - what can I do to calm me???????

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I think I would honestly pay $1 Millions dollars for 2 days alone in a Radisson (love those sleep number beds) to sleep, sleep, sleep. No "Mommy - when you getting up?" or little hands knocking on the door "ma, ma, ma, ma" or running up & down the hall like little elephants singing & dancing & screaming - No Daddy - No.

Don't get me wrong I love that my kids have fun & that Daddy is so much fun to play with but could they not turn it down a notch when Mommy is sleeping in? Well i use the term sleeping in loosely - when we were DINKS (Double Income No Kids) I would sleep in til noon. Roll out of bed - have breakfast & sometimes I would go back to bed. NO MORE! Now I am lucky if I get to sleep in til 9 & that is with a continual 15 minute wake up asking if I am still sleepy & did I know when I might be getting up.

Yep - Radisson - clean fresh comfy sleep bed - darkness - noise free - whole bed to myself mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Well a girl can dream right?

Play Time!

Wowee - I have adopted a socialite! My girl Skylar can go non-stop with friends from morning til nite!

From the moment she came to live with us our house has been filled with young 8 & 9 year old girls. My day now consists of Zhu Zhu Pets, Webkins, Fashion Shows & High School Musical Sing Alongs.

I do remember playing alot when I was younger but I honestly don't remember playing every hour of the day with friends. Don't get me wrong I actually admire the amount of friendships she is able to juggle & her ability to be a good friend through such long play dates. I am the type of person that needs "personal" breaks from others. A bit of a loner. Not my Skylar! She can go, go, go.

I am so thankful for our neighbourhood & the amount of kids within a one block radius. Some pretty amazing little girls live around us & I am thankful they have opened their homes & friendship circle to my Skylar.

PS - For those mommies entering this stage - ensure that when a fashion show is starting to ensure you set a time limit! It can truly go on all afternoon!

Disappointed

Let me preface this with the assurance that I love my girls & will love them forever & ever.

The day was a bit rough today. Limits were challenged & challenged & challenged. Mommy was fragile. So we go to a movie tonight Beezus & Ramona (a must see! Loved it) and all is well. We laugh we cry we hug. Skylar then says something that absolutely crushes & disappoints me. Something I never could believe she would say or mean. I can honestly say I was not angry - I was truly sad & disappointed.

I am really trying to balance discipline with love. It is a tough pendulum. Specifically when you adopt an 8 year old. You want to ensure you are building her up & giving her a safe & comfortable environment but you also want to ensure that you are giving her enough discipline to ensure that she is a little girl that is well liked & seen for the true beauty she has within.

My childhood came rushing back tonight - I distinctly remember coming home late from the skate park (yeah I was sort of cool - well let me dream) and I was met by my Dad on the front steps. I was so scared. I put my bike away & walked up to the steps where he sat & all he said to me was - Michelle - I am very disappointed in you. He then got up & went into the house. I still remember the horrible feeling that came over me. I was ready for a stern talking to but not at all prepared for those hurt eyes that met mine.

Tonight I felt that same disappointment. I now know it was pure love. Love towards a child that my Dad knew was so much more inside. I felt that same love for Skylar tonight. I want her to feel good about herself & get attention because of her integrity & inner beauty. Not from the "shock comments".

Tonight I pray for guidance - for love to overcome my disappointment and for a beautiful little girl who still has not learnt how truly amazing & beautiful she is - without all the attention seeking.